#Don’tTellMe that I’m fat when I know it is my nose
That keeps you near my door when I sit by the phone.
Seldom are we together when you share your essay
So I keep myself online where I am better than you know.

#Don’tTellMe that you care about the serious things
When I see you with your friends and all their cars
I know you would rather be with them than me
As I wait for you each night and find you with Mr Singh.

#Don’tTellMe that I’m carefree when you seek the higher land
And I can’t understand why you want to be Enlightened.
Am I not good enough for you? When you need more than the loo,
And I could be there tomorrow for your lecture and seminar sorrow?

#TellMe that you love me and send me some sexy texts
So that I can get on with my friends and be better than my Ex.
This is the meaning of life, far from the grown up employed strife
Where I am the star of the show and I am also all that #UKnow.

Fanciful star of your own world where eyes roll back into their sockets
And other bots put their hands in their poky pockets
#TellMe that I am more than your phone when you leave me all alone
And I cannot get to date U at Uni where I rather rate you.

Give me 5 stars and seldom will I try
To be more than a handsome guy
Where the news is rather thin
Of the worry of the warrior Djjin:
That tells Allah of my sorrow
And how I will #TellHim Judgement questions tomorrow.